The Feast of Pentecost

 

Dear Diary,

Today began with Holy Mass at St. Mary’s for the Feast of Pentecost. Robert picked us up as usual and right on time, and Mini came along happily, sitting close as if she knew it was a great feast day. The morning was soft and bright, with May flowers everywhere and the trees in the grove looking fresh and full. I kept thinking that even the blossoms looked like little flames, though gentle ones.

At Mass, Father LeRoy read the Gospel about the disciples being shut inside with the doors locked because they were afraid. Then Jesus came and stood in their midst and said, “Peace be with you.” Father LeRoy said that Jesus did not wait until they were brave before He came to them. He came right into their fear and gave them peace. Then He breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit.” Father said the Holy Spirit comes quietly and strongly, and He makes frightened hearts brave.

After Mass, when we came home, I could not stop thinking about the locked room. I walked out to the old garage in the grove, and Mini came along, of course. The garage is not locked like the disciples’ room was, but it is quiet and tucked away, and sometimes it feels like a little room God saved for prayer. The peeling white boards looked old and humble, and the flowers around it made it seem like Heaven had leaned down close to earth.

When I stood in the doorway, my imagination became very busy. I pictured the garage full of children dressed like little apostles, kneeling around Our Lady. Mary was so still and prayerful in the middle, like she knew how to wait for God better than anyone. Above them was the Holy Ghost, like a white dove, and bright golden light came down through the air. Little flames rested above their heads, but they were gentle flames, not scary ones. They were like love made visible.

Mini sat beside me and looked into the garage as if she could see it too. Her ears were perked up, and she was very quiet. I whispered, “Peace be with you,” because that is what Jesus said first. I think He knew peace had to come before courage. Then I thought of how He sent the apostles out after giving them the Holy Spirit. He did not just comfort them so they could stay hidden. He comforted them so they could go.

I wondered if Pentecost can happen in small ways at Camp Littlemore too. Maybe the Holy Spirit helps me tell the truth when I am scared, pray when I am distracted, be kind when I would rather be cross, and love Jesus even when I cannot see Him with my eyes. Maybe He can make a little farm girl brave, just like He made the apostles brave.

This evening, I am going to remember that Jesus can come through locked doors. He can come through worried thoughts, shy feelings, and even places in my heart I keep closed. And when He comes, He still says, “Peace be with you.”

Evening Prayer

Dear Holy Spirit, please come into my heart like You came at Pentecost. Give me peace when I am afraid, courage when I am weak, and love for Jesus in everything I do. Stay with Sister Mary Claire, Robert, Mini, and all of us at Camp Littlemore. Amen.

Love,
Kathy

______________________

A reading from
the holy Gospel according to John 20:19-23

On the evening of that first day of the week, when the doors were locked, where the disciples were, for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood in their midst and said to them, “Peace be with you.” When he had said this, he showed them his hands and his side. The disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” And when he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. Whose sins you forgive are forgiven them, and whose sins you retain are retained.”

The Gospel of the Lord.

Saturday — “You Follow Me

 

Dear Diary,

Today began with Robert picking the three of us up for Church as usual and right on time. Another inch of rain had fallen during the night, and Camp Littlemore was soaked through. The yard was soft, the ditches were full, the road to St. Mary’s was muddy and it was still raining. Mini came along happily, though I think she already knew the steep cave path would not be a possibility today.

On the ride to Mass, the fields looked dark and rich from all the rain. Robert drove carefully, and I thought how rain can be both a blessing and a bother. It helps everything grow, but it can also keep a girl and her Corgi from visiting a very beloved cave.

At Mass, Father LeRoy read the Gospel about St. Peter asking Jesus, “Lord, what about him?” Father said Peter had just been told to follow Jesus, but then he looked over at John and wondered about someone else’s road. Jesus answered, “What concern is it of yours? You follow me.”

Father LeRoy explained that Jesus was not telling Peter to stop caring about John. He was teaching him not to compare his calling with another person’s. Each soul has its own path with Jesus. Some teach, some pray, some serve quietly, and some write down what they have seen, like St. John. Father said we can waste too much time looking sideways, when Jesus is standing before us saying, “You follow Me.”

That made me feel a little corrected inside. Sometimes I wonder why Sister Mary Claire understands holy things faster than I do. But today I thought Jesus is not asking me to be Sister Mary Claire. He is asking me to be Kathy, with my own little heart, my own prayers, my own chores, and Mini beside me.

After Mass, Robert drove us home through the wet countryside. On the way up to the house, Mini trotted ahead of us as if she had been appointed leader of the pack. Sister Mary Claire laughed and said, “Look, Kathy, Mini is giving us a little Gospel lesson.” Mini led the way with her wet little paws and soaked up fur coat while Sister Mary Claire and I followed behind. It made me smile, because we were all following someone, and it reminded me that our true Leader is Jesus.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus,
help me not to compare my road with anyone else’s.
Help me hear Your gentle words,
“You follow Me.”
Let me follow You in my prayers,
my chores,
and my little joys.
Keep Sister Mary Claire, Robert, Mini, and me close to You tonight.
Amen.

Love,
Kathy

______________________

Gospel Reading

Peter turned and saw the disciple following whom Jesus loved,
the one who had also reclined upon his chest during the supper
and had said, “Master, who is the one who will betray you?”
When Peter saw him, he said to Jesus, “Lord, what about him?”
Jesus said to him, “What if I want him to remain until I come?
What concern is it of yours?
You follow me.”

So the word spread among the brothers that that disciple would not die.
But Jesus had not told him that he would not die,
just “What if I want him to remain until I come?
What concern is it of yours?”

It is this disciple who testifies to these things
and has written them, and we know that his testimony is true.
There are also many other things that Jesus did,
but if these were to be described individually,
I do not think the whole world would contain the books
that would be written.

“Feed My Lambs”

Dear Diary

This morning Robert picked Sister, Mini and me up for Holy Mass. The morning felt quiet and prayerful, like the whole day was waiting for the Gospel.

At Mass, Father LeRoy read the Gospel about Jesus asking Saint Peter, “Do you love me?” He asked him three times, and each time Peter told Him yes. Then Jesus said, “Feed my lambs,” and “Tend my sheep,” and “Feed my sheep.”

Father LeRoy explained it so kindly that I could almost see the morning by the sea, with Jesus standing near the fire after breakfast, looking at poor Saint Peter with such mercy. Peter had denied Him three times, and now Jesus let him say three times that he loved Him. Father LeRoy said Jesus was not trying to hurt Peter’s heart. He was healing it. Jesus was giving Peter his work back again.

Then Father LeRoy looked around the church and said, “Every one of us must answer that same question in our own way. Jesus asks, ‘Do you love Me?’ And if we say yes, He gives us someone to care for.”

I thought about that a long time.

On the way home from Mass, Robert said that feeding sheep does not always mean standing in a pasture with a bucket. Sometimes it means helping somebody’s soul not go hungry.

Sister Mary Claire said, “Kathy, lambs are the little ones, the weak ones, and the ones who need gentleness. Jesus never asks love to sit still. Love always becomes care.”

That stayed in my mind all afternoon.

After dinner, I walked in back of the house to the old garage in the grove for a little while. Robert had fixed it up for me as a quick getaway, and it is one of the dearest places on the farm now. It is not fancy, but it feels holy to me. The old wooden walls hold the warmth from the stove, and the little altar table has flowers, a crucifix, and a candle and that is exactly how I want the place to be.

Mini trotted behind me through the grove and then hopped up near the bed as soon as we got inside. I had meant to tell her to keep off, but she curled herself into a little loaf and fell asleep almost at once. She looked so peaceful that I decided she could stay. Maybe tending sheep sometimes means letting a tired little corgi sleep where she feels safe.

I knelt at the kneeler with my rosary in my hands. The stove crackled softly, and the lantern made the whole garage glow golden.

I told Jesus that I do love Him, though not as much as I ought. I told Him I wanted to say it three times like Saint Peter, because sometimes my heart needs healing too.

“Dear Jesus, You know that I love You.”

Then I said it again.

“Dear Jesus, You know that I love You.”

And then a third time, very quietly.

“Dear Jesus, You know everything. You know that I love You.”

After that, I tried to think of who His lambs might be in my own little life. Maybe Mini, who trusts me. Maybe Omelette and the hens, who need feeding and fresh straw. Maybe the people who read the Gospel sheets. Maybe someone at church who feels lonely. Maybe even Sister Mary Claire sometimes, though she seems much more like a shepherd than a lamb.

I think Jesus was telling me that if I love Him, I must be kind where He has placed me. I must feed what is hungry, comfort what is tired, and help what is little. I cannot preach like Father LeRoy, but I can love Jesus in small farm-girl ways.

When I was finished praying, I looked at Mini asleep by the bed, and the whole room felt like a little answer to the Gospel. Jesus had asked Peter to follow Him. Maybe today He asked me too, right here in the old garage, with the stove warm, the candle burning, and Mini breathing softly in her sleep.

I hope I always say yes.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus,
You asked Saint Peter, “Do you love Me?”
Please ask my heart the same question every day.
Help me to love You by caring for Your little lambs,
by being gentle, faithful, and kind,
and by following You wherever You lead me.
Amen.

Love,
Kathy
Gospel Reading

Feed my lambs, feed my sheep.

A reading from the holy Gospel according to John 21:15-19

After Jesus had revealed himself to his disciples and eaten breakfast with them, he said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?” Simon Peter answered him, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my lambs.” He then said to Simon Peter a second time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” Simon Peter answered him, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.” He said to him, “Tend my sheep.” He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” Peter was distressed that he had said to him a third time, “Do you love me?” and he said, “Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my sheep. Amen, amen, I say to you, when you were younger, you used to dress yourself and go where you wanted; but when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.” He said this signifying by what kind of death he would glorify God. And when he had said this, he said to him, “Follow me.”

The Gospel of the Lord.

Ready for More Rain

Dear Diary

Today is Thursday, May 21st, and this morning Robert picked us up at the mailbox as usual and right on time. Sister Mary Claire, Mini, and I were all ready, and the road still looked wet from the nice rain we had. The sky was gray again, and it looked like more rain was coming before long, so Sister Mary Claire made sure we had our raincoats with us. Mine was buttoned up, and Mini had her little place ready in the truck where she could stay dry.

Robert said the rain would make the fields green in a hurry, and Sister Mary Claire smiled and said that grace can be like that too. When God sends it, quiet little places in the soul can begin growing again before we hardly notice.

On the way to St. Mary’s, we talked about today’s Gospel reading because Sister Mary Claire and I had read it ahead of time. Jesus was praying for His disciples, but not only for them. He was praying for everyone who would believe in Him later. That means He was praying for us too. I liked thinking about that as we rode along the wet country road, watching the clouds gather low over the fields.

At Mass, Father LeRoy explained the Gospel in his homily. He said Jesus was praying that all who believe in Him would be one, just as He and the Father are one. Father said that this does not mean we all have the same work to do or the same place in life. It means we are meant to belong to God together, with love and peace in our hearts.

Then Father LeRoy said something I kept thinking about. He said, “Our Lord does not forget the little ones who will come after. He sees them, He knows them, and He prays for them before they even know how much they need Him.”

That made me feel very safe. Jesus prayed for His apostles long ago, but He also prayed for little girls in Iowa, and nuns, and kind neighbors named Robert, and all the people who come to Him with faith. He even knows about our wet fields, our raincoats, our little mailbox, and our quiet ride to church.

After Mass, the air felt heavy with more rain. Robert said we might get another good shower by evening, and I hoped the fields would drink it all in. I thought about Father LeRoy’s words and how Jesus wants our hearts to grow together in His love. The rain helps the farm grow, but prayer helps the heart stay faithful.

Tonight, Sister Mary Claire and I said our prayers quietly while the rain began tapping again. Mini settled herself nearby, glad to be warm and dry. I thanked Jesus for the rain, for the Gospel, for Robert’s kindness, for Father LeRoy’s homily, and for the way Our Lord prayed for us before we were even born.
Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus,
thank You for praying for us
and for keeping us close to Your Heart.
Make our hearts gentle, faithful, and united in Your love.
Help us grow in grace each day,
and keep us safe beneath Your care.

Amen.

Love,
Kathy

__________________________

Gospel Reading

A reading from
the holy Gospel according to John 17:20-26

Lifting up his eyes to heaven, Jesus prayed saying:
“I pray not only for these,
but also for those who will believe in me through their word,
so that they may all be one,
as you, Father, are in me and I in you,
that they also may be in us,
that the world may believe that you sent me.

And I have given them the glory you gave me,
so that they may be one, as we are one,
I in them and you in me,
that they may be brought to perfection as one,
that the world may know that you sent me,
and that you loved them even as you loved me.

Father, they are your gift to me.
I wish that where I am they also may be with me,
that they may see my glory that you gave me,
because you loved me before the foundation of the world.

Righteous Father, the world also does not know you,
but I know you, and they know that you sent me.
I made known to them your name
and I will make it known,
that the love with which you loved me
may be in them and I in them.”

The Gospel of the Lord.

Kept in Thy Name

Old Morning Prayer

Dear Diary,

Today is Wednesday, and Robert picked us up as usual and right on time. Sister Mary Claire and I were ready at the mailbox, and Mini came along too, looking so pretty and pleased with herself, as if going to Holy Mass was her special duty. She settled in the pickup very nicely, and I felt glad having all of us together on the road to St. Mary’s.

At Mass, the Gospel was from Saint John, where Jesus lifted His eyes to Heaven and prayed to His Father for His disciples. Father LeRoy said this was one of the most tender parts of the Gospel, because Jesus was not only teaching us, but praying for us. He said Jesus knew His friends would have to live in a world that did not always love what was holy, and so He asked His Father to keep them safe in His name.

Father LeRoy explained that Jesus did not ask the Father to take His disciples out of the world. That part stayed with me. Father said we still have chores to do, roads to travel, people to love, and duties to finish. We are not meant to hide away from everything hard. But we are meant to belong to God while we are here.

He said when Jesus prayed, “Consecrate them in the truth,” He was asking that His disciples be made holy by God’s own truth. Father LeRoy said truth is not just a lesson in a book. Truth is what keeps the soul straight and safe. It is like a good fence around a field, or like Sister Mary Claire’s hand guiding me when I am not sure where to step.

On the way home, Robert said it was a comforting thing to think of Jesus praying for His own. Sister Mary Claire said Jesus is still praying for us, and that when we feel weak or worried, we should remember that we are kept in His Father’s name. Mini looked out the window for a while, and then rested quietly, as if she knew the ride home was peaceful.

Tonight, I am thinking about how Jesus loves us so much that He prayed for us before He suffered. He wanted us guarded from evil. He wanted us to have His joy. He wanted us to be holy and true.

I hope I can remember that tomorrow when I do my chores, speak my words, and walk around Camp Littlemore. I want to belong to Jesus, even while I am still living in this world.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus, keep me in Thy holy name. Guard Sister Mary Claire, Robert, Mini, and all those I love. Help me to live in Thy truth and belong to Thee always. Amen.

Love, Kathy

________________________________________

Gospel Reading

A reading from the holy Gospel according to John 17:11b-19

Lifting up his eyes to heaven, Jesus prayed, saying:

“Holy Father, keep them in your name that you have given me, so that they may be one just as we are one.

When I was with them I protected them in your name that you gave me, and I guarded them, and none of them was lost except the son of destruction, in order that the Scripture might be fulfilled.

But now I am coming to you. I speak this in the world so that they may share my joy completely.

I gave them your word, and the world hated them, because they do not belong to the world any more than I belong to the world.

I do not ask that you take them out of the world but that you keep them from the Evil One.

They do not belong to the world any more than I belong to the world.

Consecrate them in the truth. Your word is truth.

As you sent me into the world, so I sent them into the world.

And I consecrate myself for them, so that they also may be consecrated in truth.”

The Gospel of the Lord.

Jesus Prayed for Us

The Apostles Creed

Dear Diary,

This morning Robert picked us up at the mailbox as usual and right on time. Sister Mary Claire, Mini, and I were all ready for the ride to St. Mary’s.

The fields looked fresh and green as we drove along the gravel road. The morning was quiet, and I kept thinking about today’s Gospel from St. John. It was the beautiful prayer of Jesus, when He raised His eyes to Heaven and spoke to His Father.

At Mass, Father LeRoy explained that this Gospel lets us listen to the prayer of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. He said Jesus was close to His suffering, but He was not thinking only about Himself. He was thinking about the ones the Father had given Him. He was praying for His disciples.

Father LeRoy said, “Jesus prayed for His disciples, and He still prays for those who belong to Him.” That made me feel deeply loved, and also very safe. It is a wonderful thing to think that Jesus knows us, loves us, and prays for us.

Then Father LeRoy explained the words, “Now this is eternal life, that they should know You, the only true God, and the one whom You sent, Jesus Christ.” He said eternal life is not only something far away in Heaven. It begins in the soul when we begin to know and love God. Every prayer, every Mass, every Gospel reading, and every little act of obedience helps us know Him more.

Father LeRoy also said that Jesus glorified the Father by finishing the work He was given to do. That made me think about our own daily duties. God gives each person work to do. Some work looks important, and some work looks very small, but if it is done for God, it matters. Helping Sister Mary Claire, caring for Mini, doing my chores, listening carefully at Mass, and trying to be good are all little works I can offer to Jesus.

On the ride home, Robert said he liked the part where Jesus said, “I pray for them.” Sister Mary Claire said those words are like a warm shelter for the soul. Mini sat close, and the road home seemed peaceful.

Tonight I am glad that Jesus prayed for His disciples before He went to the Father. I am glad He does not forget us while we are still in the world. I want to belong to Him more and more, and I want to keep His word like His disciples did.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus, thank You for praying for us. Help me know You better, love You more, and do the little work You give me each day. Keep Sister Mary Claire, Robert, Mini, and me close to Your Sacred Heart. Amen.

Love,
Kathy

________

A reading from the holy Gospel according to John 17:1-11a

Jesus raised his eyes to heaven and said, “Father, the hour has come. Give glory to your son, so that your son may glorify you, just as you gave him authority over all people, so that your son may give eternal life to all you gave him.

Now this is eternal life, that they should know you, the only true God, and the one whom you sent, Jesus Christ.

I glorified you on earth by accomplishing the work that you gave me to do.

Now glorify me, Father, with you, with the glory that I had with you before the world began.

“I revealed your name to those whom you gave me out of the world. They belonged to you, and you gave them to me, and they have kept your word.

Now they know that everything you gave me is from you, because the words you gave to me I have given to them, and they accepted them and truly understood that I came from you, and they have believed that you sent me.

I pray for them. I do not pray for the world but for the ones you have given me, because they are yours, and everything of mine is yours and everything of yours is mine, and I have been glorified in them.

And now I will no longer be in the world, but they are in the world, while I am coming to you.

The Gospel of the Lord.

Faith, Family, Farm, and Courage

Kathy's Latest Prayer

 

Dear Diary,

Today felt like one of those golden days when the farm itself seems to be saying its prayers.

The sun was warm and gentle, and the light fell across the barn and fence in such a pretty way that everything looked almost like a holy picture. I wore my overalls today, and Mini let me hold her for a little while by the old farm sign while Sister took our photo. Mini looked so proud and happy, with her red and white coat shining in the light. I held her close, and it made me think how good God is to give us a home, a family, animals to love, and faith to keep us brave.

Robert picked us up as usual and right on time, and we went to St. Mary’s for Holy Mass. Mini was very good, and Sister Mary Claire smiled at me when she saw how carefully I kept her settled. The church was quiet and peaceful, and I was glad to be there.

The Gospel today was from St. John, where Jesus told His disciples that they would all be scattered and would leave Him alone. That part made my heart feel sad. I thought of Jesus being so kind to them, and still knowing they would run away when things became frightening.

Father LeRoy explained it very gently in his homily. He said the disciples thought they were very strong when they said they believed. They really did love Jesus, but they did not yet know how weak they could be when trouble came. Father said Jesus was not trying to shame them. He was telling them the truth so they would not despair later. Even when they failed, He still loved them.

Then Father LeRoy said something I liked very much. He said, “Jesus did not say, ‘You will have no trouble.’ He said, ‘In the world you will have trouble, but take courage, I have conquered the world.”

That made me think of our farm sign: Faith Family Farm. Faith does not mean that everything will always be easy. Family does not mean nobody ever feels afraid or tired. Farm life certainly does not mean there is no trouble, because there are storms, mud, sick animals, broken fences, and days when chores feel too big. But faith means Jesus is with us through it all. Family means we help one another keep going. And the farm teaches us courage every day, because we must rise again in the morning and do what God gives us to do.

Father LeRoy said Jesus was not alone because the Father was with Him. Then he said that when we belong to Jesus, we are never truly alone either. Even if everybody else misunderstands us, even if our courage feels small, even if our hearts tremble, God is still with us.

After Mass, I kept thinking about Mini in my arms by the sign. She trusts me so completely. She does not understand every trouble, but she knows she is loved. I think Jesus wants me to trust Him that way. I do not have to understand everything. I just have to stay close.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus, when trouble comes, help me not to be afraid. Keep me close to You, close to my family, and faithful in the little duties of farm life. Thank You for Mini, for Sister Mary Claire, for Robert, for St. Mary’s, and for Father LeRoy’s good words today. Please help me remember that You have conquered the world. Amen.

Love,
Kathy

____________

Today's reading from the holy Gospel according to John 16:29-33

The disciples said to Jesus, “Now you are talking plainly, and not in any figure of speech. Now we realize that you know everything and that you do not need to have anyone question you. Because of this we believe that you came from God.”

Jesus answered them, “Do you believe now? Behold, the hour is coming and has arrived when each of you will be scattered to his own home and you will leave me alone. But I am not alone, because the Father is with me.

I have told you this so that you might have peace in me. In the world you will have trouble, but take courage, I have conquered the world.”

The Gospel of the Lord.