Recording Our Lady’s Prayer - None

Little Office of the Immaculate Conception

Dear Diary,

Today Sister Mary Claire and I spent a good part of the day recording the Second Part of The Little Office of the Immaculate Conception. It felt important and peaceful all at once, and Sister wanted me to say the words carefully and understand them too, not just read them out. I liked that, because prayers feel warmer when you know what they are really saying.

One prayer especially stayed with me tonight. It called Our Lady the Queen of Heaven, the Mother of Jesus, and even the Mistress of the world. Sister explained that this does not mean Mary is above God, of course, but that God has given her a beautiful place of honor because she is His own dear Mother. And when the prayer says she forsakes no one and despises no one, it means Mary never turns away from us just because we are little or sinful or ashamed. She is always kind enough to look on us with pity and tenderness.

Sister said the prayer is really asking Our Lady to do what loving mothers do best—take our poor needs to Jesus. We ask her to beg forgiveness for our sins and to help us stay close to Him. And the part about celebrating her Immaculate Conception means being glad that from the very beginning God made Mary so pure and lovely for His great plan. Sister said when we honor that gift with true devotion, we are also asking for the grace to reach Heaven ourselves one day, not by our own goodness, but by the grace of Jesus.

I thought that was so beautiful. It made me feel that Mary is not far away in Heaven doing grand things only for saints. She is near us, and gentle, and ready to help even with the prayers of an ordinary girl at a little table with a recording machine. I was glad to think that maybe if I pray slowly and lovingly, Our Lady might hear my voice too and smile a little.

Mini stayed nearby through it all, sometimes watching us as if she understood this was not just talking but praying. By evening I felt tired, but in a good way, like we had done something worth doing.

Evening Prayer

Dear Blessed Mother, please keep me close to Jesus tonight.

Pray for my sins to be forgiven, and help me love purity, gentleness, and goodness more and more.

Thank you for never turning away from poor little souls who need you.

Lay your mantle over Sister Mary Claire, Mini, and me, and lead us safely toward Heaven.

Amen.

Love,

Kathy

Recording Matins

Little Office of the Immaculate Conception

 

Dear Diary,

This Sunday afternoon I finished recording Matins from the Little Office of the Immaculate Conception, and I felt very thankful when it was done. It took a long time because I am so particular about it. Sister Mary Claire helped me all along with the cues and showed me where to pause, where to soften my voice, and where to say the words more clearly. I kept wanting to rehearse certain parts over again until they sounded just right.

It was slow work, but good work. Sometimes I would think I had it, and then Sister would gently have me do that little part once more. I did not mind, because such beautiful prayers ought to be said carefully. When I finally finished Matins, it felt like I had set down a small bouquet for Our Lady.

Mini stayed close by through all of it, watching in her serious little way. Once she gave a deep sigh and curled up as if she thought prayer recording was very tiresome business. But then when I started again, she lifted her head and listened so hard that I told her she was my littlest helper.

Now Matins is finished, and Prime shall be my next project. I already know it will take some time too, because Sister says good prayer should never be rushed, and I believe that is true. So I mean to go on the same way, one careful part at a time, until Prime is done too.

Dear Blessed Mother, please help me pray slowly and faithfully, and let every word I say be for Jesus. Amen.

Love, Kathy

Jesus and His Blessed Mother

Dear Diary,

Today I thought about how Our Lord must have shown Himself first to His Blessed Mother after He rose from the dead. The Bible does not say it plain, but it feels so right. She loved Him more than anyone and stayed faithful even at the Cross, when everything was so sad and dark.

This morning when I went to the chicken house, I reached under dear Omelette and found a beautiful brown egg still warm beneath her feathers. I held it so carefully in my hand and thought how lovely it is when something quiet and hidden turns out to be full of life and sweetness. That made me think of Our Lady waiting in sorrow, still believing, even before the joy of seeing Jesus came.

Then I imagined the moment when Jesus came to her, not suffering anymore, but full of glory and life. All her tears must have turned into happiness. The same dear Son she had loved and held was now shining in heavenly beauty.

It makes me love Our Lady very much to think of her joy. She trusted Jesus through all the darkness, and then she saw His victory. I want to stay close to Him like that too, in happy times and sad ones both.

Evening Prayer:

Dear Blessed Mother, please teach me to trust Jesus always and stay close to Him, just as you did. Amen.

Love,

Kathy

Jesus Kept His Wounds

Dear Diary,

Today’s meditation made me think about how Jesus rose from the dead all full of glory, and still kept the holy wounds in His hands and feet. I kept picturing them not looking sad anymore, but shining like lovely signs of His love. It makes me feel that He never wants us to forget what He suffered for us, and how very much He loves us.

Sister Mary Claire said His wounds are like victory marks now. That thought stayed with me all day. If Jesus kept His wounds in Heaven, then they must be very precious to Him. They tell the whole story of His mercy.

Later on I made a quick trip to the cave with Mini to check on my beaver friend Shaggycoat and to make sure the cave was secure. All was well, thank goodness. The cave felt quiet and safe, and it seemed like a good place to think about brave things. I wondered if I am as brave as I ought to be in little hard things, like being patient, obeying quickly, or offering up small troubles without complaining.

The saints loved to think about the wounds of Jesus because they wanted to stay close to Him no matter what. I do too. I want to love Him not only when things are easy, but also when something costs me a little.

Evening Prayer:

Dear Jesus, let Your holy wounds remind me how much You love me. Help me be brave in little hard things, and teach me to love You back with all my heart. Amen.

Love,

Kathy

Kathy is very busy recording all of your Favorite Prayers

The Angelic Salutation

Dear Diary,

Today at school Sister Mary Claire taught me something lovely about the Hail Mary. She said it is such a little prayer, but it carries a whole great deal inside it. Part of it comes from the angel’s own words to Mary in the Bible, and then part of it is us asking Our Lady to pray for us.

Sister said the name of Jesus sits right in the very middle of the prayer, and that is just where He belongs—not only in the Hail Mary, but in everything. I liked that thought very much. She also said when we pray “now and at the hour of our death,” it means we can ask Mary to help us in our everyday life, and also at the very end, when we will need Heaven most.

It made me think the Hail Mary is small enough for a schoolgirl to learn by heart, but deep enough to keep teaching her all her life.

Evening Prayer:

Dear Blessed Mother, please help me pray the Hail Mary slowly and with love, and always bring me closer to Jesus. Amen.

Love, Kathy

What I Learned Today at St. Mary’s School

 

Dear Diary,

Today at St. Mary’s School, Sister Mary Claire taught me that the Our Father is not just a prayer to hurry through because we already know it by heart. She said it is really a way to help us live.

I liked that it begins with “Our Father,” because that means God is not just my Father all by myself. He is our Father, and that means we belong to Him together. It made me think how life is not supposed to be only about what I want.

Then Sister said when we pray for God’s will to be done on earth as it is in heaven, we are asking that heaven’s goodness might come even into our regular days. Into school days and church days and even chore days.

The part about daily bread stood out to me most. It made me think that God wants me to trust Him for today. Not to be so full of worry about every tomorrow. Just to ask Him for today’s help and today’s strength.

Sister also said that when we ask God to forgive us as we forgive others, it means we have to let go of our hard feelings too. That part is not always easy, but it is good and true.

And at the end, when we ask not to be led into temptation, it means we are admitting that we need God to help us stay good. We cannot do it all by ourselves.

So I think the Our Father is a prayer for the whole day, not just for church. It teaches us to love God, think of others, trust Him one day at a time, forgive, and ask for His help.

Love,

Kathy 

The Cornerstone of Faith

Dear Diary,

I knew I was in trouble when Sister Mary Claire said we ought to scrub the old schoolhouse behind St. Mary’s. It has been closed for years, so it was a mighty dusty job.

Mini kept us company while we worked, and at the end Sister gave me her very first school handout about the Resurrection. She said the lesson came from her old meditation book, the one she inherited from a nun sister in Ireland. I noticed Sister had written #1 in the corner, and that made me think this was not just one of Sister’s passing whims.

Dear Jesus, help me do hard jobs with a cheerful heart, and bless Sister Mary Claire and little Mini. Amen.

Love, Kathy.

Take a Deep Dive

At the Foot of the Tabernacle

Dear Diary,

After all the joy of Easter Sunday, today slipped in very softly.  Sister Mary Claire and I walked to St. Mary’s, and everything felt so still and quiet after the gladness of yesterday. The church was now empty and wrapped in a hush. The little red sanctuary lamp burned softly, and I knew that Jesus was just as truly there in the quiet of today as He was in all the joy of yesterday.

I thought how people are always glad to be near the ones they love, and that must be why Jesus made a way to stay near us in the Blessed Sacrament. He did not want to leave us all alone. That made me feel very small, but in a good way, because it means He thinks of us and cares for us even in all our littlest needs.

I told Him about the things in my heart and thinking of Sister's little German Prayer book, I wrote what I remembered of the ask and seek prayer.

Dear Jesus,

You told us to ask, to seek, and to knock—and that You would answer us. So here I am, asking You with my whole heart.

Please give me a real love for You—a love that is gentle and strong. Help me love You not just with my words, but with the way I live, and the little things I do all day long.

I want to keep loving You always, and never stop.

Amen.

And today, I offer You everything I do—joined with all the goodness of Jesus, Mary, and all the saints.

Amen.

Easter Sunday

Recorded at Littlemore

Holy Saturday

Dear Diary,

Tonight felt very quiet, almost like the whole world was waiting. Sister Mary Claire and I thought about Jesus resting in the tomb, and how Holy Saturday is the still day between the sorrow of the Cross and the joy that is coming. The Church keeps this day in silence and waiting, holding close both grief and hope.

Mini stayed near us again, sweet and faithful as ever. She seemed to fit right into the hush of the evening, and having her close made me feel comforted.

Tonight I prayed and asked Jesus to help me wait with love and trust. Holy Saturday feels like a day for being still, for staying near Him, and for believing that even when everything seems quiet, He is still at work. Tomorrow is Easter, but tonight I want to stay close to Him in the silence.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus,

stay near me in the quiet of this holy night. Help me wait for You with love, peace, and trust.

Bless Sister Mary Claire and bless dear little Mini tonight.
Keep us close to Your Sacred Heart, and make us ready for Easter joy.

Amen.

Love,

Kathy

 

Good Friday Night

 
Dear Diary,

Tonight I prayed and asked Jesus to give me a real love for Him, gentle and strong. Good Friday makes me sorry for my sins, but it also makes me feel safe, because Jesus loves us so much.

Mini stayed close, sweet as ever, and that made everything feel even more peaceful. I want to love Jesus truly, not just with words, but in the little things too.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus,

please give me a real love for You, gentle and strong.

Bless Sister Mary Claire, bless dear little Mini, and keep us close to Your Sacred Heart tonight.

Amen.

Love,

Kathy

The Cows are Out

Dear Diary,

This morning I woke up from the strangest dream. I dreamed one of the cows was peeking right in my bedroom window while more of them were running loose outside and around my room. It felt so real that I opened my eyes fast and looked toward the window.

Then Sister Mary Claire laughed and told me she had whispered in my ear while I was waking up that the cows were out. She said it was an April Fools’ joke, and I guess my sleepy mind turned it into a whole dream.

Afterward Sister explained the difference between a little shenanigan and a lie. She said a lie is meant to deceive, but a harmless joke is found out quickly and shared with laughter, not meant to hurt or truly frighten somebody. I thought that was a very good way to explain it.

We both laughed then, and I felt better knowing the cows were safe where they belonged. My little resolution today is to be truthful always, and also kind, even in joking.

Morning Prayer

Dear Jesus, thank You for this new month and for Sister Mary Claire, who teaches me so gently. Please help me to love the truth, keep a cheerful heart, and always be kind. Amen.

Love, Kathy

Jesus on The Cross

Dear Diary,

This early morning Sister Mary Claire and I stayed tucked in bed a little longer with Mini curled in close, and we read today’s meditation together. It was about Jesus hanging on the Cross while people mocked Him and said cruel things, and yet He still prayed, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” The meditation says He bore not only terrible pain, but also ridicule and contempt, and that He answered it all with silence, mercy, and love. It also says we should learn from Him to be humble, to bear little hurts quietly, and to excuse the faults of others instead of making them bigger.


I thought how hard that must have been for Jesus, because mean words can hurt so much even when they are small, and His suffering was so much greater than anything I have ever known. Sister said that when Jesus prayed for His enemies, He was showing us His Heart right in the middle of pain. That made me feel very quiet inside. Mini had her little nose tucked near the blanket, and somehow the whole bed felt like a tiny chapel while the morning light was just beginning.


I want to remember that my own little pride can make me touchy and quick to feel hurt. But Jesus, who was treated so terribly, did not strike back. He loved. He forgave. He even made excuses for those who did not understand what they were doing. I think that is such a beautiful and sorrowful thing. I would like to be softer today, and not so ready to mind every little thing.


Morning Prayer


Dear Jesus, when I begin to feel hurt or proud, please help me remember You on the Cross. Teach me to be humble, quiet, and kind. Give me a heart that does not hold onto little grievances, but forgives with love. Let me stay close to You and learn from Your patience. And please bless Sister Mary Claire, little Mini, and our whole day from the very start. Amen.

A Quiet Day After Palm Sunday

March 30

Dear Diary,

After Church, Robert brought us back home. Then Sister Mary Claire and I spent the day at home with Mini. We did some spring cleaning, and later we read and talked over today’s meditation together. It was a quiet day after a beautiful Palm Sunday.

The meditation was about the inscription placed over Jesus on the Cross, and how even there He was shown to the world as King. Sister said it is a wonder to think that our dear Lord, so hurt and humbled, was still truly reigning from the Cross. Not like an earthly king with banners and soldiers, but with love, suffering, and mercy.

I kept thinking how beautiful it is that Jesus did not come to rule by force, but by giving Himself. The meditation made me think that I should not want to look important or be praised, but should be glad to belong to Him quietly. Sister Mary Claire said that if Jesus is really the King of my heart, then I ought to let Him have His way in little things too, especially when I would rather be proud, stubborn, or noticed.

That stayed with me all through the afternoon.

Sometimes I think I want Jesus to be my King, but I do not always want the humility that comes with loving Him. Yet today’s meditation made me want to bow my head a little more sweetly and say, yes, Lord, rule over me. Be my King in my thoughts, in my words, and even in the little hidden corners of my heart.

By evening the house looked nicer, the day had grown still, and it felt good to sit down quietly together. Palm Sunday has passed, but it seemed to leave behind a kind of hush, as if Holy Week had come and was asking us to stay very close to Jesus.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus, my crucified King,

Thank You for this quiet day and for bringing us home safely from Church.

Thank You for Robert, for Sister Mary Claire, and for dear little Mini.

Please clean my heart even better than we cleaned the house today.

Make me humble, gentle, and glad to belong to You.

Teach me to honor You not only with my prayers,

but with the little things I do all through the day.

Rule over my heart, dear Jesus,

and help me stay close to You during these holy days.

And please bless our home tonight with Your peace.

Amen.

Love,

Kathy

Palm Sunday at Bedtime

 

Dear Diary,

Tonight Sister Mary Claire and I listened to Bishop Barron’s homily right before bed, and it made the room feel very still and serious, like when the church goes quiet during the Passion reading. Mini was curled up close beside us and looked so sleepy, but I was trying hard to listen to every word.

Bishop Barron talked about Palm Sunday being called Passion Sunday too, because we hear the whole sad story of what happened to Jesus. What stayed with me most was what he said about Judas. I always think of Judas as the one who betrayed Our Lord, and that is true, but tonight I kept thinking about how sorry he was afterward. It made me feel such a strange sadness inside, because it showed me that sin is awful, but also that God’s mercy is bigger than we can understand.

Sister Mary Claire said that even when people go very wrong, God still pursues them with mercy. I liked that word pursues. It made me think of Jesus not turning away, but still calling, still loving, still wanting the sinner to come back. Even the worst sinner is not forgotten by Him. That made me feel comforted, because if Our Lord is that merciful, then I should never be afraid to run back to Him with my little faults and failings.

Palm Sunday feels both beautiful and sorrowful to me. The palms are joyful, but the Passion is so heavy. Tonight it seemed to me that Jesus walked right into all that suffering with His Heart open. And even in the middle of betrayal and sadness, His mercy was still there.

After the homily, I said my evening prayer and tried to tell Jesus I was sorry for every time I have been careless in loving Him. I asked Him to keep me close this Holy Week and not let me wander far away.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus,

thank You for letting me listen to words tonight that made me think about Your mercy.

Please have mercy on me too, and on everyone who feels far away from You.

Keep Sister Mary Claire and little Mini safe through the night,

and help me stay near Your Heart all through Holy Week.

Amen.

Love, Kathy  

Getting Ready for Palm Sunday

Dear Diary,

Tonight Sister Mary Claire and I read the meditation about the soldiers casting lots for Our Lord’s garments while He hung upon the Cross. It made me feel so sad to think of Jesus being stripped of even the last thing He had, and how even then He was still pouring out His Precious Blood for us. Sister said people can still treat Him coldly now, especially when they forget His love in the Blessed Sacrament, and that made me want to love Him more and never be careless with holy things.


Tomorrow is Palm Sunday, and Sister Mary Claire and I will go to Mass again, and Robert will give us a ride. I am glad of that, because Palm Sunday always feels so solemn and tender to me, like Our Lord is entering Jerusalem in meekness even though He knows the sorrow ahead. I want to go with a quieter heart this year and not be thinking about my own little comforts so much.


I hope when I hold the palm tomorrow I will remember that Jesus gave up everything for love of us, even His garments, even His Blood, and that I should not be stingy in loving Him back. Sister Mary Claire said that when we learn to be content with little, our hearts are freer for God. I think that must be true. Even a small sacrifice, if it is given lovingly, can make room for Jesus.


Mini was with us this evening while we read, resting so close by as if she knew Holy Week is beginning. The house felt peaceful, and I was thankful for Sister, for Robert giving us a ride tomorrow, and for the quiet way Jesus teaches us through these meditations.


Evening Prayer


Dear Jesus,

thank You for shedding Your Precious Blood for me.
Please forgive me for all my carelessness and teach me to love You better.
Help me not cling too tightly to little earthly things, but to keep my heart free for You.

Bless Sister Mary Claire, good Robert, and dear little Mini tonight, and let us go to Palm Sunday Mass with reverence and love.

Amen.

Morning Prayer at Littlemore

A Quiet Kind of Sadness

 

Dear Diary,

Today I think I understood something a little better, even though it made me feel sad.

When I said the prayer again—“O most holy and afflicted Virgin”—I started to feel why it sounds the way it does. It isn’t just words. It feels like kneeling right beside Our Lady while she stands at the Cross.

It says she watched the “agony of thy expiring Son” and that her whole life was full of sorrow, and I think that’s what I was feeling today—not just sadness, but a kind of love that hurts because it cares so much.

And when I said, “look down with a mother’s tenderness and pity on me,” I almost felt like I wanted her to see me and understand. Not just my little troubles, but that I want to love Jesus too, even when it’s hard or sad.

The part that stayed with me the most was when it said she “drank so deeply of the chalice” of Jesus’ suffering. That means she didn’t turn away. She stayed. And maybe that’s what we are doing right now in Lent—staying with Him, even when it hurts our hearts.

I think my sadness today was not just being sad… it was being close.

Close to Jesus.

Close to Our Lady.

And maybe that’s why the Church lets us walk through all of this again, even though it’s already over—so we don’t forget how much love was in it.

I still whispered, “When will Easter come?”

But now I think… we are walking toward it together.

Tonight I will listen to my recording again and try to stay there quietly, not rushing away.

Evening Prayer:

O most holy and afflicted Virgin, help me to stay with you at the foot of the Cross, and to love Jesus even when my heart feels heavy. Amen.

Love,

Kathy

The Little Spruce and a Little Light at the End of the Day

Dear Diary,

Today Sister Mary Claire and I worked on planting the little dwarf Alberta spruce she bought at Christmas. We put it by the cave entrance, high above the creek water where the ground is safe, with rich fertile silt left there long, long ago. I thought it was just the perfect place for it. Someday it may look like a little green guard standing at the door of the cave.

Shaggycoat was given very strict instructions to leave it alone. Sister made a hoop of chicken wire around it, just to help him remember. He watched us in a very serious way, as if he wanted to be part of the planting too, but we told him this was one bit of cave business he must not touch.

By evening I sat down quietly and copied the German version of St. Bernard’s Memorare. I worked slowly by lamplight, trying to make each word neat, and at the same time I was working on memorizing it too. The German sounds so different from the English prayer I already know by heart, but somehow it still feels the same inside, like Our Lady understands the love in it no matter what language it is said in. Sister Mary Claire said that was a lovely thing to notice, and I thought so too.

It felt like such a peaceful ending to the day, with the little spruce planted at the cave and the prayer spread out before me in my notebook. It truly seemed like a little light at the end of the day.

A Little Light at the End of the Day

Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that it has never been known that anyone who fled to your protection, implored your help, or sought your intercession was ever left unaided.

With that trust in my heart, I come to you now.
I hurry to you like a child, and I stand before you, knowing I am weak, but hoping you will help me.

O dear Mother, please do not turn away from me.
Listen kindly to my little prayer, and hear me as I call to you from this world that can sometimes feel sad.

Help me in all my needs, now and always, and most of all when I need you the most.

O loving,

O gentle,

O sweet Mother Mary, stay close to me.

Amen.

A Little Light at the End of the Day

Dear Diary, 

Tonight, after everything had grown quiet, I sat on the edge of my bed with my little prayer book in my hands, and Mini curled up close beside me. The room felt soft and still, like it was just waiting for a prayer.

Sister Mary Claire came and sat with me, and we said the Memorare together—the English one I already know by heart. I didn’t even have to look down at the page, and it felt nice saying it so easily.

Then Sister showed me the old German page she had already translated for me, and we read that one too. I told her it sounded a lot different—but somehow it still felt the same.

Sister smiled and said it really is the same prayer. She explained that the Latin is the original, and the English one I know is a faithful translation, but the German one is a little fuller—like someone speaking more from the heart, adding tender words to stay longer with Our Lady.

I liked that very much.

When we read it again, I noticed the way it stretches out the prayer just a little, like it doesn’t want to hurry away. It felt warm and close, like sitting beside someone you love and not wanting to leave.

Mini lifted her head for a moment while we were reading, like she was listening too, and then she tucked herself closer into the blanket.

I told Sister I want to learn that version too—even though I already know the English one—because the German one sounds so beautiful, and I want to understand it more and more. She said that was a lovely idea, and that knowing both might help the prayer grow even deeper in my heart.

So tonight I made a little resolution:

I will try to memorize the German Memorare too, just a little at a time, and say it with love.

Before I turned out the light, I whispered the prayer again from memory, and it felt like a small light glowing in the dark—quiet and steady.

That’s what I want to call it:

A Little Light at the End of the Day.

Dear Mother Mary,

please stay close to me tonight,

and help me remember that I am never alone.

Amen.

Love, Kathy

Morning Offering with Mary

 

Dear Jesus,

You came down from Heaven to be close to us, and I love You for that.

Blessed Mother,

you believed God, and because of your yes, blessing came into the world.

Please help me to believe like you do.


Hail Mary…

you are full of grace, and the Lord is with you.

Blessed are you, and blessed is Jesus, your Son,

who made everything and loves us so much.

Holy Mary, Mother of God,

please pray for me now,

and when it is time for me to go to Heaven.

Dear Mother Mary,

help me stay close to Jesus,

help me see what is right,

and take away anything that pulls me from Him.


And one day,

please take my hand

and lead me safely to Heaven.

Amen.

Recording Omni Die

Dear Diary, 

Tonight felt extra special. After supper, Sister Mary Claire and I sat close together at the table with the little tape recorder she found at the thrift store. Mini was curled up nearby, watching us with her soft eyes, like she knew something important was happening.

Sister helped me with the words from that old German book—the St. Marien-Buch. The pages are a little yellow and worn, but the prayers feel so alive, like they’ve been loved for a very long time. She told me the hymn is called Omni die, which is Latin. She said it means “every day,” and I liked that very much because it feels like something I can do—love Our Blessed Mother every single day.

It also made me think how people long ago were saying these same words, maybe in little churches or by candlelight, and now I was saying them here at our table.

I tried to read slowly and gently, just like Sister said, so it would sound nice when I played it back. I got a little nervous at first, but then I imagined Our Blessed Mother listening, and it made me feel calm again.

Mini stayed so still the whole time, only giving a tiny sigh once, like she was resting in the prayer too.

When I finished, I pressed the stop button and we listened to it together. My voice sounded small, but kind of sweet too. Sister smiled at me and said it was just right.

I think I like this little recorder very much. It feels like a way to keep prayers safe, like tucking them into a box to listen to again later.

Dear Blessed Mother, please help me love you every day, just like the hymn says, and stay close to Jesus always.

Love, Kathy

Before Bed with Bishop Barron

 

Dear Dairy,

Before bed, Sister Mary Claire and I listened to Bishop Barron’s homily together, and Mini curled up nearby like she was listening too. The part that stayed with me most was that Jesus wept. Sister said it shows how tender His Heart is, and how He does not stay far off from our sorrow.

She told me that sometimes Jesus seems to wait, but that does not mean He is absent. He is still loving us and working, even when we do not understand. I liked that very much.

Tonight I want to remember that Jesus comes close to us in our sadness, and that He can bring life even into the hardest places.

Dear Jesus, help me trust You always. Bless Sister Mary Claire, Mini, and our home tonight. Amen.

Love, Kathy

Reggie and My Tape Recorder

Dear Diary,

Tonight after supper, Sister Mary Claire sat with me and read a story from a very old little book called True Stories for First Communicants. She told me it was first published in 1949, and as she read, I held my new tape recorder very carefully and decided I would make a recording of it all by myself. I wanted to keep the story just the way she read it.

Here is what I recorded:

 

TRUE STORIES FOR FIRST COMMUNICANTS published in 1949.

REGGIE

A few years ago in a large convent school you might have seen a happy band of children getting ready for their First Holy Communion. Such little mites they looked, nine boys and seven girls, the youngest only six, the eldest eight years old. Though they were so young they were very much in earnest, all trying to fill their hearts with beautiful flowers for Little Baby Jesus. Day after day they would come running in to tell Sister of some fresh flower just added to the rest. It would be: “Sister, I gave a penny to a poor boy coming to school!” or: “Sister, I turned the rope three times instead of jumping,” or a fidgety little mite would say: “Sister, I never looked round once the whole lesson,” and so on, each wanting Sister to know how much he or she was trying.

The First Communion Day was to be on the 25th of March, the beautiful Feast of the Annunciation. Now all preparations were made. Each little soul had been washed in the Precious Blood of Our Dear Lord in Confession the day before, and the great morning of the 25th had come. Such a beautiful spring morning it was. One by one the children arrived, the little girls in their white dresses with their snowy veils and wreaths of roses on their heads, and the little boys in nice suits. As they came in, each sat quietly in a little chair in class, until all were ready. One little lad, in changing his shoes, had soiled his fingers and asked if he might go and wash them. “I couldn’t go to Holy Communion with dirty fingers, could I, Sister?” he said as he went. Alas! how little Sister or he thought what that little act would cost him.

As he was washing his fingers he spied a little cup just beside the basin. Without a thought he filled it to the brim and took a long refreshing drink, then, running quickly back to the others he sat down contentedly in his chair. Two minutes later there was a knock at the door. Sister was wanted. One of the servants was there; she came to say she thought—she wasn’t sure, but she thought—she had caught sight of one of the little gentlemen taking a drink of water. Sister’s heart sank within her. Could it be true? Returning to the children she said quietly: “Did any little boy forget and take a drink of water?”

Poor little Reggie! In an instant it flashed into his mind what he had done. With the remembrance came the temptation not to tell, but it was only for a moment. No, he would be brave. White as his little suit, and trembling from head to foot, he looked up at the Sister. “Oh, Sister, I did—I never thought. Oh, Sister, what can I do?” Tenderly drawing the child to her side Sister tried to comfort him, telling him that he need only wait till to-morrow. But the poor little fellow seemed quite stunned, unable to realise what it all meant.

Then they went up to chapel in procession. Reggie knelt beside Sister. What were his thoughts as he knelt there in that beautiful chapel, watching the priest and listening to the sweet singing? Presently the bell rang for the Elevation. Then the children made aloud their short “Acts before Holy Communion.” The longed-for moment had at last arrived. Slowly and reverently the little ones went up to the altar rails—all but Reggie. Only then did the truth really dawn upon him—Baby Jesus could not come into his heart. All would receive Him, only he would be left out. Poor little Reggie, he burst into passionate sobs, startling all in the chapel. He was obliged to be taken out that the others might not be disturbed.

All that day he joined with the others in their games and amusements. Such a sad little face he looked among the others whose hearts were overflowing with peace and happiness.

But the next morning very early, when all his little companions of the day before were still in bed, Reggie’s father and mother brought him once more to the convent. No music and singing to be heard to-day. All the music was in Reggie’s heart as at last Baby Jesus entered it for the first time. How much he had to tell Him—all about the long weeks of preparation and then about the bitter disappointment of the day before. But how happy he was now, and how quickly the moments flew.

“I had to finish talking to Jesus all the way out of chapel!” he said. But I don’t think he or his little companions could ever forget that they must be “fasting from midnight.”

After I finished recording, I just sat very still. Sister said Reggie loved Jesus so much that even when he made a mistake, he told the truth right away. I think Jesus must have been very close to him.

I held my little tape recorder and imagined that maybe someday someone else might listen to this and love Jesus more too.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus, please help me to be brave like Reggie and always tell the truth. Stay close to me, especially when I come to You. I want my heart to be ready for You always.

Love,

Kathy 

The First Recording of Spring

Dear Diary,

Today felt like a little miracle—47 degrees on the very first day of Spring! The snow is finally giving up, and the air didn’t bite my cheeks the way it has for so long. It almost felt like the world was taking a deep breath again.

But the very best part of today was what Sister Mary Claire brought home from the thrift store. She found an old tape recorder—with a whole box of unused reels—and guess what? She gave them to me. All of them. Just like that.

I could hardly believe it.

We set it on the table, and when I pressed the buttons and saw the reels begin to turn, it felt like something very important was happening. Like my words could be kept safe and remembered. Sister said I could use it for prayers, or readings, or even my diary if I wanted.

So I made my very first recording.

I was a little nervous at first, but then I began with my morning prayer, just like always:

“I will begin and end each day with Jesus and Mary in my heart…”

As I said the words out loud, it felt different—stronger somehow. Like I wasn’t just thinking them, but really giving them to Jesus. I imagined Him right there, close to me, listening in that quiet, loving way of His. And I thought of Mary too, so gentle, helping me keep my thoughts where they belong.

I told them both that I want to stay close. That I don’t want to forget.

Maybe if I keep saying these prayers—maybe even recording them—my heart will start to feel more like theirs… full of love and peace.

Mini sat nearby the whole time, watching me like she knew something special was happening. Her little ears were perked up, and she didn’t even try to play.

Tonight I feel so happy and thankful. Like I’ve been given a little way to hold onto something good.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus, thank You for this beautiful first day of Spring, and for the gift of this recorder. Help me to use my words for You, and to keep You and Mary always in my heart. Please make my heart gentle and loving like Yours. Amen.

Love,

Kathy

The Thaw and the Thorn-Crowned King

Dear Diary,

This morning I woke up to the sound of water dripping from the roof. It wasn’t snow anymore, but a soft, steady dripping, like everything was slowly letting go. Sister Mary Claire said it was already 36 degrees, and it felt almost like a promise that spring was near.

Mini lifted her head and listened with me, her ears stretched out like little airplane wings. The whole farm felt quieter, but also alive again.

Before getting ready for Church, I went out to gather the eggs from the chicken coop. Long icicles hung from the roof, and drops of water fell one by one. When I opened the door, the hens hurried out to see the warmer weather, all curious and stepping into the slushy ground. They clucked and wandered just a little ways, like they were testing it.

Since they were so busy exploring, I just left them be after gathering eggs and went back in to get ready for Church.

Robert picked us up as usual and right on time on his way to Church. The roads were wet and slushy, and his truck made that familiar crunching sound. He said it felt good to be out again after the storm, and I think we all felt the same.

At St. Mary’s, everything seemed especially peaceful. It felt like coming home after being away.

In his homily, Father LeRoy spoke about the Crowning with Thorns. He said that Jesus didn’t just suffer pain, but also allowed Himself to be mocked and treated like nothing, and that He accepted it all out of love. He said sometimes the hardest thing is when our hearts are hurt, not just our bodies.

On the way home, Robert said he never thought about how much of it was done just to make fun of Jesus, and that it must have been a deep kind of hurt. Sister Mary Claire nodded and said that the crown of thorns was offered for all the pride and selfishness in the world.

When we got home, Sister explained it more simply to me. She said Jesus wore that crown to take away our pride, especially the kind that hides inside our thoughts and feelings. She told me that when I feel hurt or unnoticed, I can remember Him standing there so quietly, not pushing anything away.

She said loving Him means letting go of those feelings and trusting Him instead.

Right now Mini is curled up beside me, warm and sleepy, and everything feels good.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus,

When I think of Your crown of thorns, help me to be gentle and humble in my heart.
When I feel hurt or forgotten, remind me of Your quiet love.
Teach me to offer You even the smallest things with patience.

Help me to love You more each day.

All for Jesus,

Love, Kathy.

Wednesday - After the Blizzard

Dear Diary, 

This morning the blizzard was finally over, and everything looked so bright and still, like the whole world had been tucked in under a thick white quilt. The temperature was 34 degrees, and the snow had a heavy, wet feel to it. We waited and watched for the snowplow, but it came just a little too late for Church. Sister said it couldn’t be helped, and that sometimes God keeps us close to home for a reason.

Not long after, dear Robert came with his tractor and loader, just like he always does, and he cleared our driveway so we could at least move about again. The big scoop of the loader made such satisfying sounds pushing the snow aside, and Mini barked a little at it but stayed close to me.

The rest of the morning and into the afternoon, Sister Mary Claire and I worked together digging out paths and tidying up what the storm had left behind. My boots felt heavy with snow, and my cheeks got rosy from the cold, but it felt good to be outside again.

Later in the afternoon, we came in and warmed ourselves, and Sister read to me the meditation for today—The Scourging at the Pillar. She read slowly, and I could almost see it in my mind, Jesus standing there so quietly, even though He was hurt so badly.

Sister said that even though Jesus was completely innocent, He allowed Himself to be treated like the lowest of all, even like a slave, because of how much He loves us. She told me that sometimes love doesn’t look strong on the outside—it can look quiet and patient, like Jesus standing there without complaining.

She explained that when we think about His suffering, it should make our hearts feel sorry for our sins, but also very grateful, because He chose to go through all of it for us. She said that even the hard things we go through—like the cold, or being stuck at home, or when things don’t go our way—can be little ways to stay close to Him if we offer them up with love.

I kept thinking about how the meditation said His whole body was like one great wound, and how His Precious Blood fell to the ground. It made me feel very quiet inside. Sister said that when we feel that way, it means our hearts are listening.

She also said that Jesus didn’t have to suffer so much, but He chose to, so we would never doubt His love, and so we would have courage when we have our own troubles. She smiled and said, “When something is hard, Kathy, you can remember—Jesus has already gone much farther for you.”

Tonight I am trying to remember that when things feel uncomfortable or unfair, I can be patient and offer it to Jesus, just like He accepted everything with love.

Mini is already curled up, all warm and sleepy after our long day, and the house is quiet again after the storm.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus,

Thank You for loving me so much that You were willing to suffer for me.

Please help me to be patient when things are hard, and to remember Your love when I feel uncomfortable or tired.

Make my heart gentle and thankful, and help me to offer even little things to You with love.

I want to stay close to You always.

Amen.

Love,

Kathy

After the Blizzard

DearDiary, 

The blizzard let up today, but it is still very cold, only single digits, and the road hasn’t been cleared, so we stayed home again.

Mini sat by the window watching the snow drift and flicked her little ears when the wind stirred. Everything outside looks quiet and white, like the world is resting.

Sister Mary Claire and I read the meditation about Pilate. He asked, “What evil hath He done?” and still let Jesus be punished.

I asked Sister why he would do that if he knew Jesus was innocent.

She said softly, “Because he was afraid, Kathy. He wanted to please everyone instead of choosing what was right.”

That stayed with me. I thought about how sometimes even I know what is right but hesitate.

Sister said that Jesus stood there quietly and took everything with love. She told me that loving Him means trying to stay calm and patient, even when something feels unfair.

The chickens were all safe and tucked in, and Omelette looked content on her roost.

Tonight feels very still. Before bed, we prayed, and Sister said part of the Divine Office. It made everything feel peaceful, like the whole day was placed in God’s hands.

Evening Prayer

O my Jesus, help me to be brave and choose what is right. Teach me to be patient and quiet like You, and to trust You in all things.

Love,

Kathy

The Blizzard’s Last Hold

Dear Diary, 

The blizzard still has its grip on Camp Littlemore tonight. The thermometer outside the kitchen window read four degrees above zero, and the wind keeps sweeping the snow across the fields like white smoke. The radio says the storm is still moving through, but Sister Mary Claire smiled and told me that however long winter tries to hold on, spring is already right behind it.

This afternoon we read the meditation from The Circling Year about Pilate asking the crowd what he should do with Jesus. The people shouted so loudly, “Crucify Him!” that Pilate gave in, even though he knew Jesus had done nothing wrong. Sister said the saddest part was that Pilate knew the truth but did not have the courage to follow it.

I thought about that while the wind rattled the windows today. It must have been terrible for Jesus to stand there while everyone shouted against Him. Sister explained that the meditation teaches us not to be half-hearted like Pilate, but to choose what is right even when it is hard. She said Lent is a time to learn to carry our little crosses with Jesus.

Mini stayed close to the stove most of the afternoon, curled up in a tight little circle. When she did step outside she came right back in again, with snowflakes clinging to her whiskers. The chickens are tucked safely on their roost in the coop, and the drifts are piled high against the fence. Everything at Littlemore Farm is snug and quiet even though the storm is still racing across the fields.

Before supper we stood by the window and looked toward the road that leads to St. Mary’s, now completely hidden by the blowing snow. Sister reminded me that the people of the parish are probably all huddled safely in their homes tonight just like we are.

She said storms always look strongest right before they pass.

Tonight that made me think about the cross too. The crowd thought they had won when they shouted for Jesus to be crucified, but Sister said the cross was really the beginning of the greatest victory the world has ever known.

So even while the wind is howling tonight, I think spring must be getting ready somewhere just beyond this storm.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus,

You stood quietly before Pilate while the crowd shouted against You.

Please give me a brave heart so I will always choose what is right and stay close to You.

Watch over all the families of St. Mary’s parish tonight, and keep them warm and safe in this terrible blizzard. Protect the farmers, travelers, and anyone who may be caught out in the storm. Guard our little farm too, and keep the animals safe in their shelters.

And when this last winter storm finally passes, please help us remember that Your light is always stronger than the darkest wind or snow.

Amen.

Love,

Kathy

Fourth Sunday of Lent and Snowed-In

Dear Diary,

This morning the thermometer said 27 degrees, and the wind was howling so hard that the snow was flying sideways past the windows. The blizzard the radio warned about yesterday has truly come. The announcer said the roads are shut, and even Church was canceled for this Fourth Sunday of Lent. That hardly ever happens, but the snow is piling up in great drifts.

Still, all is well at Camp Littlemore Farm.

After chores and making sure the chickens had feed and fresh water in the coop, Sister Mary Claire and I decided we would have a little church right here at home. Sister set the radio on the table, and Mini curled up at our feet like she knew something important was happening.

We listened to Bishop Barron’s homily on the radio. He spoke about the story of the man born blind from the Gospel. Sister explained it to me afterward while the wind rattled the windows.

She said that the man in the story is meant to be all of us. We are born into a world that is sometimes dark because of cruelty and sin. It is like being born without sight. But then Jesus comes and says something wonderful: “I am the light of the world.”

Sister said that means Jesus doesn’t just teach us about light—He actually gives us light, helping us see what is good and true.

I looked out the window then. Everything was white with blowing snow, and it was hard to see very far at all. It made me think how easy it is to lose our way when we cannot see clearly. But if Jesus is the light, then even in a blizzard like today, we are not really lost.

Mini lifted her head when the radio finished and wagged her little bottom. I think she believed church was over.

Tonight the wind is still singing around the house, but inside it feels peaceful. I am thankful that even when the roads close and we cannot reach church, the light of Jesus still reaches us.

Evening Prayer

Dear Jesus,

You are the Light of the World.

Please shine your light into my heart so I may see what is right and good.

Help me never walk in darkness but always follow you.

Bless our little farm, Sister Mary Claire, Mini, and all those traveling in the storm tonight.

Amen.

Love, Kathy

The Day the Snow Came Sideways

Dear Diary,

Today it was 31 degrees, and the sky looked like it had something serious in mind. The radio said there was a winter storm watch, and before long the snow began flying sideways past the windows like little white birds that had lost their way. Sister Mary Claire looked out at it for a while and said it might be wiser to wait and go to Church tomorrow instead, when the storm might pass. I was glad she said that because the wind was howling so hard it rattled the old window frame.

Even though we stayed home, I kept thinking about today’s meditation called “Barabbas Is Preferred to Jesus.” Sister explained it to me at the table while the snow kept blowing harder and harder outside. She said it must have been very sad for Jesus to stand there so quietly while the people chose Barabbas, who was a criminal, instead of Him. Just a few days before they had shouted Hosanna and wanted Him to be their king, and then suddenly they changed their minds.

Sister said sometimes people can be like that when they forget God and start thinking more about themselves than about what is right. She told me the meditation is asking us a question in our hearts: Do we choose Jesus, or do we choose something else instead?

I sat there thinking about that for quite a while. Jesus stayed silent and humble even when people treated Him unfairly. Sister said His Heart was still praying the whole time. That made me feel a little ashamed because I sometimes complain when small things bother me.

Before supper I went out to the chicken coop to make sure the hens had plenty of food and water before the storm got any worse. The wind pushed the snow right across the yard and into my coat sleeves. The chickens were already tucked in on their roost, warm together above the straw and clucking softly in the dim light.

When I came back inside, I brushed the snow from my coat and boots and warmed my hands by the stove while Mini stayed close beside me, happy to be back in the warmth.

As the snow kept sweeping across the yard, I thought again about the crowd choosing Barabbas instead of Jesus. I hope that when my own little choices come during the day, I will remember to choose Jesus and stay faithful to Him.

Dear Jesus,

I am sorry for the times I choose my own way instead of Yours.

Help me to be faithful and not change like the crowd did.

Teach my heart to love You more than anything else, and to stay close to You even when it is difficult. Amen.

P.S. I checked the chicken house one more time before dark, and Omelette was tucked safely on her roost between two other hens. She gave a soft little cluck when she saw me, as if to say everything was just fine in there despite the storm.

Love,

Kathy ✧

The Silent Road to Church

Dear Diary,

Robert could not pick us up for Church this morning, so Sister Mary Claire and I walked. It was one of those bleak March days when winter does not seem quite ready to let go. The gravel road was wet and muddy in places, and the snow lay in thin patches across the fields. Mini trotted ahead of us, her little paws splashing through the puddles while the cold wind blew across the open land.

Sister Mary Claire held my hand as we walked along the road toward St. Mary’s. The sky was pale and gray, and the bare trees stood quietly on both sides of the road like they were waiting for spring.

While we walked, Sister began explaining today’s meditation about Jesus at the Court of Herod. She said that when Jesus was brought before Herod, the king asked Him many questions because he hoped to see a miracle. But Jesus did not answer him at all. Sister said Jesus could see that Herod’s heart was not sincere. He only wanted to satisfy his curiosity.

The road stretched ahead of us and everything was very quiet except for the sound of our boots on the wet gravel. Sister Mary Claire said that sometimes Jesus speaks to people many times through their conscience or through the advice of others, but if they keep ignoring Him, their hearts can grow hard. That is why Jesus remained silent before Herod.

Mini stopped for a moment and looked back at us as if she wanted to make sure we were still following her.

When we arrived at Church, Father LeRoy spoke about the same meditation in his homily. He said that when Herod mocked Jesus and dressed Him in a white garment, Jesus accepted the humiliation with patience. Father said that our pride often makes it hard to accept correction or even small embarrassments, but these little sufferings can help make our souls stronger if we offer them to God.

On the walk home the road looked even quieter than before. The gray sky and the bare trees made everything feel still, and I kept thinking about Jesus standing silently before Herod while people laughed at Him. The whole world must have seemed very cold and lonely then, yet He accepted it all for love of us.

Tonight before bed I said a small prayer.

Dear Jesus,

please help me listen when You speak to my heart.
Do not let me grow proud or stubborn.
Teach me to accept little humiliations quietly just as You bore mockery with patience before Herod.

Let me always follow Your voice.

Amen.

Love,

Kathy.

Source:  The Circling Year